The question of “What is my purpose?” is a big question which I think occupies many of our minds and rightly so. This is such an important question to ask because the answer to it determines much of our lives; how we spend our time, what we do and do not do, what opportunities we take up and which we ones we turn down, who we associate with and who we don’t…the list is endless. The vast amount of books, YouTube videos and even courses dedicated to answering this question confirms just how much we want to find out the answer to this huge question. I won’t pretend that at 20 years old and in one blog post I can answer this question in full for you, but I will share with you some keys based on a source more reliable than any other known to man, from a wisdom incomprehensible to man on how to find your purpose firstly and secondly how to walk in it/what to do once you have found it. So will guide you through a process of purpose based on Psalms 37 Step 1: Trust God (vs 3) The process of uncovering your purpose must begin with a trust in God, an unshakable belief that no matter what He has your back, that whether you know what it is or don’t – He made you for a purpose. Step 2: Delight (vs 4) Grow to be a lover of presence; immerse yourself as often as you can. At first this may feel like a chore, but I promise you, the more you learn about Him, of how loving and beautiful He is, you won’t want to do anything else. As humans we get distracted, that is inevitable but keep delighting after you do get distracted, pick up your Bible even if you haven’t for a few days – master the art of failing and getting back up. As you then continue to delight, His desires become your desires. When the Bible says he will give you the desires of your heart, it literally means that He manifests His desires into your heart. It does not mean, like a lot of us misunderstand it, that he will gives us anything we want. Step 3: He then gives you the desires of your heart (vs 4) Imagine God with this great big heart, with all of these desires – to help people, to heal people, to set people who were bound free, to bring emotional healing, to bring light into dark places etc. But God being spirit cannot make any of those things happen in a physical world without a physical body, and so that’s where we come in. We do have a physical body - the capacity to touch the world in a way that an invisible God cannot. So we, after delighting in God (which should be continual) now carry the same heart of God, the same desires as God AND the physical body to execute them. And this is where the idea of purpose comes in. God will impress a specific desire on your heart based on the way He uniquely designed you in order to make that desire a reality. For some he will impress a desire to educate people and so has uniquely formed them with an ability to express complex ideas in a simple way For some he will impress a desire to set people free and so has uniquely formed them with a gift to create music that does just that. Step 4: Act (vs 5) So once you know what your purpose is – how God uniquely formed you to manifest an aspect of His desires for the word. What then? The answer is, just move. The verse says to ‘commit your ways unto the Lord’ – unless you act then you have nothing to commit. Unless you write that song, contact that agent, start that blog; then what ‘ways’ do we have to commit? What actions do we have to commit? I will encourage you with this – you already know what the next step is. The later part of the verse tells us that ‘The steps of good man are ordered’. Once you become aware of your purpose, your steps naturally work towards your purpose weather you see it or not; but you must actually step to realise this. This idea of committing, simply means that as you move and act, you do not run ahead of God. You keep delighting in Him. Step 5: God will make it happen (vs5) Once you have begun to act, begun to gain momentum; it is God who causes your purpose to unfold. “Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this” Yes, it is you who acts but it is God who makes it happen, It is him who ensures that your steps are not taken in vein. So always remember this – it is not your duty to bring your purpose to life; it is Gods, all you have to do is take step, to move. Step 6: Trust and wait (vs7)
This step is essentially reiterating the point made above, which is to relax. Do not stress about the things you cannot control – immerse yourself in the things you can and trust that God himself will take care of the things you can’t. This is how you enjoy the journey and avoid the stress and anxiety that often comes when people try to make it on their own. You cannot ensure your song will be a best seller – sing it anyway. You cannot ensure millions of people will read your blog, write it anyway. You cannot ensure your channel will gain thousands of subscribers - start it anyway. You cannot ensure their healing will come – lay your hands on them anyway. You cannot ensure it will sell – write the book anyway. As you do this, as you take the steps toward your purpose, not getting caught up in the thought of fame or money or success (although those things will come inevitably) God promises to make it happen. So, I hope this helps you as you navigate your way to your purpose but always remember that the beauty is in the process. As you work towards the destination, never forget to look around you and see the sights, to smell the flowers, to stop and stare at the sunset, to love those around you deeply and to laugh often. All my love Mayfair x
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It goes without saying that breakups are highly emotional experiences, for even the most thick-skinned of us; involving many tears, plenty of anger and lots of confusion. But none the less, they are experiences. So, after I got past the initial breakup stage – perhaps the most fragile, I decided that this experience had cost me too to not learn something from it. I’d cried too many nights, endured too much breaking, too many moments where it felt like the ground beneath me was falling, too many days which felt more like lifetimes – not to take all I could from this experience, to not grow from it. I think we often ignore the fact that experiences themselves do not make us better – in fact they can make us bitter, it’s rather the reflection of these experiences that holds the potential for us to get better, wiser. By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest. ~ Confucius Let me make it clear that when I talk about reflection, I am not talking about asking what you could have done differently but asking what you can do differently based on what you now know. Notice how the former question is based on the past, something which would do you no good to reflect on since you cannot change it whilst the former focuses on the future. It is a question that reflects a commitment to your growth – what can I do differently? Looking at the past, not for the sake of it but for the sake of who you want to be. Its really easy after a breakup to look at what the other person did so wrong, why you deserve better, how badly they messed up, how they weren’t that great anyway – and whilst for a while I admittedly went through this process, I had to ask myself what the point was of focusing on the flaws in someone that was no longer in my life at the expense of looking at the flaws in my own life; the only person I am guaranteed to live with forever. So, I guess with that – in a commitment to always being open and honest with you all in the hope that you learn something from me baring my flaws in all of their blood and beauty, I will share with you one of the major reflections I came to from my breakup, which is this: I had prioritised my relationship and this ideal of being a wife above God. And I cannot express to you how much of a hard but honest conclusion this was for me to come to and it would probably require more words than this blog post would allow for me to fully explain. But I will say that perhaps it happens more easily than we think. I didn’t even realise I had it in me to love a person as much as I loved him, on some days it felt as though my heart beat only for him, we were best friends. And whilst this is beautiful; it wasn’t as beautiful as the love, the life I had in Christ, but on some days, I forgot this. On some days I forgot that whilst his arms may have held me, the hands of the invisible God had formed me. That whilst the boys’ words made my heart melt, the breath of God made it beat. And I finally saw what Moses meant when he said that God was jealous for us. God doesn’t want to be your Top God, he wants to be you only God. So, with that I make this vow to the man that God has for me: I will love you like I love myself. I will be your number one fan. I will listen with eagerness to every wild, dumb dream you have and commit to it as if it were my own. I will be your safe place in a cold world. But I will not, I will not find my worth hidden in your words of affirmation, I will find it in the Word of God. I will not spend more time with you than I do in the presence of my saviour. I will not find more joy at the thought of being your bride than I do the thought of being the bride of Christ. I will not put my relationship with you above my relationship with my first love. I will not make our relationship an idol. I hope you see the magic in reflecting on all experiences – good and bad; your growth depends on it.
All my love. Mayfair x |
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